Dreams always appear
The thought of doing something new
The chance to encounter a new horizon
For a new beginning
A challenge to take once we’ve reached the goals we set ourselves
To change the perceptions of many
To believe more in our own abilities
For a new future
One that will give us enormous joy
A sense of achievement that is beyond our imaginations
Oh! How it would be to achieve this dream!
Like a dream come true.
Note: this post was first published on Medium
I have been thinking about what the word happiness really means to me. I think it’s a misnomer, in that the concept of happiness misleads and makes believe that it is attainable consistently when in reality happiness is an expression which frequently fluctuates and is inconsistent. Balancing this happiness within ourselves, if there’s such a thing as consistent balancing act, is a state of mind that many of us find difficult to attain. It is in many cases not attainable as the situation in which we are inevitably has an effect on how happy one can be. Happiness to me is a momentary realization depending on the situation.
Not everyone can remain happy all the time. It is also quite abnormal to not experience a variety of emotions. No one, out of the many people I know, has always been happy or content with their lives. Yet, happiness is the one ‘goal’, ‘aim’, desire that we long to strive for. Maybe the reason that we desire for happiness or say things like “I just want to be happy” is because it is a difficult emotion.
We tend to have various goals in life which can make us happy once the goals are achieved. Sadly, these goals are also momentary. They do not last forever. To consistently do the same thing that makes us happy without thinking of it as a tedious task (once we are used to it) might be the only way to remain happy. However, a lot of research also suggests that learning new things and not doing the same thing repeatedly is key to happiness. This makes me believe that there is no mantra or set principles that we can define that will make us happy – individual happiness also varies on a large scare and an aspect that makes one individual happy might not be effective on another individual.
As much as we believe that we are individually responsible for our happiness this is not true. Society and the environment we live in tremendously impacts on the way we feel. We can choose to ignore things and avoid instances that do not make us happy but we are not in control of the situation around us many times. The place we live in, the partner we choose, the school we go to, the behavior of our colleagues, the people we meet in a cafe, the friends we make, the family we are born into, the childhood experiences we have inevitably have an effect on our emotions – although we can choose to control our emotions, most of the times it is a reaction to the life we surround ourselves with.
I therefore find it challenging to be happy. I am satisfied with myself, yes. But happiness although related is not the same as it is an everlasting desire that we need ‘to achieve’ most of the times.
One of my favorite songs is Enigma’s return to innocence
That will be the return to yourself
The return to innocence
There’s so much meaning and fulfillment that I receive from the song, it’s hard to explain exactly what I feel or to put it in words. But it will not stop me from trying.
I guess it’s because there’s a deep sense of innocence in me which is yet to be untapped. This innocence I feel is pure and cannot be corrupted even under the influence of the most corrupt. It is a feeling of purity, a sense of fulfillment. It reminds me that I do not have to try to be anyone else, but what I am and how I feel is enough to gain what I want out of life, being myself is good enough to make people like me for who I am – and it works every-time.
Whenever I try to be something I am not, whenever the feeling of restlessness kicks in and I do something I am not too proud of, I know it is because I am not my true self. The innocent self within me will never lead me astray. It’s about being human with all our joys, sorrows, difficulties and just being true to the way we feel – whatever it may be. That is what makes me a beautiful person and all the beautiful people I have met seem to have the same attribute of letting their innocence show. It’s when we are afraid or terrified of something that the innocence is hidden. It’s still there but it requires confidence. It requires brevity. It requires understanding and enlightenment. The first notion that appears in someone’s mind when I say the word “innocent” is that of a child – yes, children are innocent but you do not have to be a child to maintain this innocence. Innocence or being a good person embodys everyone regardless of age or substance. The innocence I am mentioning is that of a more mature innocence than that of a child. A child might be innocent because he or she is not aware of everything around them and have not been told. But the innocence relevant to this blog article is that of a mature innocence where people know (say about sex or alcohol or abuse) and yet remain innocent.Yet remain to be on the good side. Yet remain to be transparent in the way they perform actions.
This transparency and this innocence is a result of truth. Truth is the main attribute needed to achieve this innocence, the innocence required for us to trust ourselves, for us to return to our own innocent self – truth is the pathway. As much as I try to be my innocent self I cannot help but understand that judgement does not go hand in hand with innocence.
Love is acceptance without judgement – and what else is love? If not innocence. Trying to be someone you are not will never lead you to the right path. Remember this. You can only be you. You can only find innocence within yourself. Only then will the rest of the world become available to you. This is a rule I need to live by and I need to repeat to myself everyday as much as possible. I have only stepped into the realm of innocence a few years ago and it is time to develop that innocence within me to achieve the impossible. To be truly happy, not just with myself but with everyone else around me.
Any feedback in the comments section is appreciated.
Doing things alone by myself isn’t so bad. Just the other day, I went to a pasta-place to have lunch by myself and I really enjoyed the experience. I know of some people who are scared to experience things by themselves, and I have to ask – why?? There is nothing wrong in being alone, doing things on our own, going to a museum or sipping coffee by oneself. It in fact increases confidence and self-respect. I feel a lot more satisfied and a boost in self-esteem when I explore things by myself.
I can live alone and that is in itself a satisfaction that will keep me sane for the rest of my life. It shows that I trust myself completely, love myself for who I am and am not afraid of bystanders staring at me or judging me for doing things on my own. Yes, friends are necessary and we need people from time to time but not all the time.
Being alone without feeling lonely, is a gift not many people know. For instance, just go to a coffee place with a book and sit there reading and experience the joy that will come to you. It is very satisfactory for me.
I enjoy being by myself, exploring things, going out and getting inspiration. It is a special feeling to do things alone. You should try it sometime and tell me how it makes you feel.